Twenty-Something Eventful Hours

By her pool reading a big book of zombie stories, I first met Angelina on Sunday night. I like her and that feeling was mutual until she met me and found out we were the same height. There were other reasons, too, but that was the most immediate one. Anyway we talked and it was nice.

In class on Monday afternoon, I found out that Elselyn was engaged. She's a month older than me and probably the one person I'd been infatuated with longest. Since I was seven to around when I was thirteen and then I never really saw her much after that. Ruben and Stefanie still visit pretty regularly, and Aron shows up every now and again, but I don't recall seeing their sister in a long time. So yeah, she's figured out who she wants to marry; meanwhile, I only just had my first date ever earlier this evening.

But yeah that first date ever was pretty nice. It was only a date in the sense that there were just two of us and I paid for the whole thing, but I enjoyed it and I got some good advice for future dates and later on in the evening there was hand-holding so I'm happy.

I need more money. I wonder how much more work I can do without compromising my studies.

Things I Will and Won't Miss about Malaysia

At some point after I get my degree, I plan to leave Malaysia and either live somewhere else in the Commonwealth or in the Netherlands. Here's what I will and won't miss about living in Malaysia.

Things I won't miss:
1) The weather. Malaysia has three seasons, and all of them are terrible.

You've got the default season, Hot, where the humidity and equatorial sunlight conspire together to make you start sweating from the second after you finish your morning shower all the way until you get back home, shut all the curtains, turn on both air-conditioners and your fan to prevent everything from melting. You can also look forward to baking inside of your car if you leave it outside for more than five minutes. More than once I've been unable to even leave the parking lot because my steering while is so hot that driving is impossible without oven mitts.

Next you've got Haze, which is what happens every year when Indonesia sets itself on fire to get rid off all the excess wood they end up with from their deforestation and everyone upwind of them gets to enjoy a post-apocalyptic version of their cities where schools close, streets empty, visibility is reduced to almost nothing, and anyone brave enough to venture outdoors does so with surgical masks and bandannas around their faces like they're in a zombie movie. Actually, Haze might be my favourite of the three seasons just because of how awesome everything looks.

Finally you've got Wet, where it rains everyday and flash floods pop up everywhere, ruining your floors if you happen to let the rainwater seep into your house, and causing insane traffic jams on all the roads. One time I was driving to pick my sister up from something or other and I had to drive through what used to be a highway but had temporarily become an urban river. When we got home I noticed that my license plate had been ripped from its screws and swept clean off. Floods are hardcore, man.

2) The traffic. Rain isn't the only thing the causes jams. Cars will also slow to a crawl if there's an accident up ahead, or some particularly exotic roadkill (think python or monitor lizard or giant rat), or if the police have decided to send an inept traffic warden to direct traffic at a busy junction, or if it's between six to nine on a weekday morning, or if it's five to nine on a weekday evening, or if it's anytime on a Friday, or for seemingly no reason at all. It's one of the reasons owning a motorcycle is so great.

3) The hotness. Not to be confused with item #1 on this list, the hotness here refers to the ratio of beautiful people to normal-looking people to ugly people in the country. While we seem to have proportionally as many ugly people as any other country, everyone else seems to be exceedingly plain-looking. Good-looking people are few and far between. It's probably part of the reason that modelling and acting for commercials pays so well around here.

My beliefs about how hot the populations of other countries come from what I've seen personally (for Holland, Australia, and the States), or from documentaries (Australia), the sounds of their voices while I'm at work (Australia, New Zealand), and pictures of my Tumblr followers. That last one might just be because everyone on Tumblr is attractive. It's weird but I challenge you to find an exception to that rule.

4) The food. Every local and tourist you ask will disagree with this point, but however much I wish I did, I do not share their tastes. A lot of the local food here is pretty okay, but everything else is either too spicy or looks like vomit. I don't care how good of an acquired taste it can be, if it looks like someone barfed on my plate and it has the texture of regurgitated toilet paper, I won't be that interested in eating it, no matter how cheap and readily available it is.

Also western food is amazing and freshly-baked bread is amazing and the candy overseas is amazing and those are all things that are nowhere near as common here as they are in, say, the Netherlands or Australia or  New Zealand. Also also, bacon. Malaysia is a predominantly Muslim country, and as such most places do not serve pork. This means no bacon burgers, no bacon pizzas, no bacon anything. It's the worst, you guys.

5) The accents. Malaysian accents tend to be more of the comedy variety, which is part of the reason why killing dudes is so fun in Just Cause 2 ("HE CUT ME WITH HIS WIRE THING") and the Petronas Twin Towers levels in Hitman: Silent Assassin ("You wanna boom-boom with Charlie?"). I'd much rather listen to accents of the sexy (Australia, West Coast USA, New Zealand, parts of the UK), super-chillaxed (Netherlands), badass, or unclassifiable (South Africa) variety.

6) The cockroaches. They fly, they aren't afraid of the light, they're huge, they seem to crawl onto my body way more than random chance would allow for. Also they are everywhere.

Apparently Corinna had never even seen a cockroach before she visited Malaysia. I don't seem to remember ever seeing one in any of my visits to Holland, either. There were some massive mosquitoes that one time, but that actually turned out to be a good thing because it made them so much easier to swat.

7) The ridiculous censorship. Some examples: "I ****ed a Girl"/"I kissed a ****" (actually acknowledged by Katy Perry when she performed here), "Inglourious ********", "Super Sapiens" (Hellboy), Snakes on a Plane (Which was censored for the first fifteen minutes before the board eventually gave up and let everything through except for the "Enough is enough" scene, which is arguably the best one in the movie), District 9 (Where the censorship board was confounded by the speed at which everyone was talking, which resulted in them censoring the words immediately after "Fuck"), Hancock (Where the use of the word "Asshole" was actually a plot point, but every scene with it was cut), Kick-Ass (Where nobody was censored except for Hit-Girl and anyone swearing at Hit-Girl), and The Grey (Where almost a quarter of the movie was cut because Liam Neeson yells at God).

8) The grass. Not cannabis; the actual grass beneath your feet. It's all crabgrass, which is itchy as hell and grows super-fast and doesn't even look that good. It also sucks at collecting morning dew and the ground underneath it is always waterlogged like mad for days after rain.

Things I will miss:
1) My friends and family. Once I leave the country I won't be seeing them again except on Christmases and weddings and maybe the occasional Chinese New Year. If I go to Holland, though, I will have a whole other side of my family to get to know, which could be fun. I'll finally meet my female cousins. Except for my sisters, it's all boys in this generation of Cheahs.

2) The internet. Australia's internet regulations are ridiculously backwards, and the censorship is almost worse than Malaysia's. Also laws against piracy are actually enforced in Europe, which means that I'll have to deal with being months behind American TV shows and I'll actually have to deal with EA and Ubisoft's backwards DRM which causes an endless supply of headaches for legitimate customers but does nothing against pirates.

3) Cheap stuff. Movie tickets are cheap, petrol is subsidized, electronics are cheap, food is cheap, and alcohol is cheap unless it's beer or you actually care about the quality, in which case it is crazy expensive. If I'm overseas, though, I'll probably be using a stronger currency, which will at least make buying things online relatively cheaper.

4) The malls. Like the cockroaches, our malls are huge and everywhere. If you've got the cash, you're never too far from someplace where you can get a good meal, watch a movie, get your groceries, buy a book, buy some clothes, or rush-buy a gift for someone whose birthday Facebook just reminded you it was.

So yeah, the fact that the former list is twice as long as the latter should be a good indication of my feelings about this country. It's nowhere near the worst place in the world, but there are so many places that are so much better so I see little reason to stay once I have the money and skills to survive on my own.

Driving, Gua Tempurung, Kuala Woh, and Cameron Highlands with Corinna

As of Tuesday the 16th of November, 2010, this post is incomplete. That's what happens when I procrastinate. It's not my fault that this is such a good, free book. Anyway:

My alarm went off at eight-ish on Sunday. I didn't wake up; I wanted to sleep more.

My dad came in at nine and told me that Corinna was waiting for me, so I woke up.

I showered and I think I may have read the Bible, but I definitely skipped my exercises. I do so little that it doesn't matter, anyway.

I packed some extra clothes and a couple of towels. I decided to put my laser in a bag, too, because why not? Also, I packed some sandals because I didn't want to ruin my shoes

I called Corinna. She had thought we would be leaving a lot earlier because I had told her at one point that I would be waking up at six. I had changed my mind the day before and I thought I told her that, but apparently I hadn't.

Before we got in the elevator I asked Corinna why she hadn't packed extra clothes. She said that she didn't mind getting wet in those clothes because they were old then Malaysian sun would dry them out pretty quick anyway.

We got in the car and I drove. We'd agreed beforehand that I would drive there and Corinna would drive back. I got to the toll for the North-South highway in less them then I thought it would take. After that we just drove and talked.

I spent a while the night before putting songs on my phone to listen to on the way there, but Corinna preferred the radio so we listened to that instead. Some good stuff came on, so I didn't mind.

We talked a bit about Mormons and Rastafarians and Jesus and the Catholic church and abortion and teen pregnancy and palm oil and contraceptives and sexual education. There was other stuff, but I forget.

We pulled into the Tapah rest stop for brunch at KFC. Corinna had never eaten KFC before. We each had a snack plate and large wedges and a box of popcorn chicken. Corinna was too full to finish the popcorn chicken, and she couldn't even look at the chicken leftovers so she just covered them with a cloth instead.

We talked about stuff. I asked Corinna when she wanted to have kids and her answer was a very specific 28, but she had no reasons behind it. I thought that was interesting.

We went to the rest of the rest stop so I could get some drinks and candy and so Corinna could try to find a toilet that wasn't a dirty hole in the ground. When we walked to the food court she almost recoiled from the smell. She said it was the worst smell she had ever smelled. It was just dried fish.

I bought a Red Bull and a Coke and some packets of Nano Nano and some Strepsils and a bunch of lollipops. I also got a razor and some glue. Corinna was gone, so I called her and told her to meet me at the car. Apparently the smell had been too much for her and she left.

I gave Corinna a Nano Nano in the car and her reaction was priceless. She reacted exactly the same way that most Malaysians do when I let them try licorice. She said it tasted like vegetables and vanilla. I didn't think it tasted like that at all. She declared it the most disgusting thing she had ever tasted. She still hasn't tried durian. Anyway, when we got back home I gave her a pack to share with her friends in Germany so she could enjoy their reactions like I enjoyed hers.

Gua Tempurung was easy to find. It's fortunate that I had a leadership camp in that area for college earlier this year.

The entrance for wet tours had ended at twelve and it was already twelve-forty, so unfortunately we couldn't go in. Well, Corinna felt pretty fortunate. She has a fear of confined spaces like submarines and space shuttles and tight crawlspaces in caves, so she was glad she wouldn't have to crawl through a subterranean river. I was a bit bummed. I had packed my boardshorts and everything.

We couldn't even go on the longest dry tour because we needed to have five people. I tried to convince three other people to come with us, but they didn't have enough time, so we ended up buying tickets for the 45 minute tour.

My dad called me right before we were supposed to go in at 1pm. I told him where we were and what we were about to do. He told me to drive safe.

The cave was pretty fun. It was quite cave-like, and I was really glad I had brought my laser. The best place for a laser is a cave, really. There were a lot of stairs and it was very humid and there were a lot of people, so we got pretty sweaty.

When we reached the end of the tour, I asked the guide if he could take us further. He said it was fine, but we'd of course have to pay the extra price as if we had gotten the ticket for the "Top of the World" dry tour. I was very pleased with this, because it meant we could stay for another hour and it would only cost three ringgit more each. A small group of other people decided to come with us, too.

The rest of the tour group started going back, but before they did I let a kid play with my laser. I figured I'd've wanted to play with a laser if I was a kid in a cave, so there was no reason to deprive him. Oh yeah, earlier on in the tour some chick asked if Corinna was my wife. I thought that was pretty funny. Corinna's exact reaction when I told her had been "What?".

Anyway, we continued to the tour to the "Top of the World". There was more walking and more stairs, but it got cooler deeper in the cave so it was alright. There was even a breeze at one point.

Eventually we came to this huge cavern that was the end point. It was, indeed, pretty high up. Previously when I had been there they turned off the lights, but the guide told me that they didn't do that any more. He could turn them off at the place with the breeze, though, so that was nice. In the meanwhile I sat with Corinna and tried to find Top of the World on my phone so I could play it and have everything be all appropriate and stuff, but I had deleted the song. I was pretty upset with myself for that.

We turned around and went to the tunnel with the breeze. I tried to talk to Corinna but she told me to be quiet because the total silence in the cave was really nice. I told her that we couldn't hear the silence even if I wasn't talking because the guys behind us always were. She pointed out that they stopped sometimes, but I didn't. She had a point, because after she said that they did for a few minutes and there was silence and it was nice.

The guide turned off the lights. My laser looked really cool in total darkness. I told Corinna to come check it out, but she didn't come.

Someone walked out of the rails to take a picture. I walked out of the rails because I wanted to walk out of the rails. Also, there was a big rock and I wanted to see if I could lift it. I couldn't. I smelled the dirt, but it smelt like the kind of dirt you get on the side of the walls in condominium basement car parks, so it was a bit disappointing.

We left the cave and we were very sweaty. Corinna still smelled nice, though. I asked her why and she said it was because of her Nivea body lotion or something. I asked her how much it was and if they made one for guys. She said yes to both, so now I know what I'm going to buy with my next pay (aside from polo shirts).

We got in the car. Our drinks were warm. We decided to go to a gas station and buy colder ones because we were still thirsty and also because we needed to refill a Touch 'N Go card so we could pay for the tolls. It cost more than RM20 to get from KL to where we were.

After we bought the stuff and I topped up my card, we got back in the car and drove to Cameron highlands. It was further down the highway than we remembered it being.

Okay, it's almost nine o'clock here at the office. I'll continue this post tomorrow.

Okay, it's tomorrow.

While driving up to Cameron Highlands, I spotted the Sufes campground, which brought back some memories of Writer's Camp many years ago and a BB camp less many years ago. A little ahead of that, I saw a sign for Kuala Woh, and I knew that that was where we had to go.

I missed the turning at first because it was on the wrong side of the road, but I found a place to turn around a little ways down. The road to Kuala Woh was not as well-maintained as the main road up to the Highlands, which made sense.

I sounded the horn as I approached a big turn in the road and explained to Corinna why. It was so that people on the other side would know I was coming so they'd slow down and stick to their side and there wouldn't be an accident.

We parked at Kuala Woh and I'm not sure how I got in my swimming pants. I think I asked Corinna to go wait by the river first.

Anyway, I went down and met her. She thought the water was dirty. I walked around in it for a bit until I found what I was looking for, and I called her over.

Hot springs are cool, especially ones along rivers because then you get the contrast of the cool river water rushing by but the hot spring water bubbling through the sand at your feet. I forgot what Corinna's reaction was but I think she was at least slightly impressed.

I put my shirt with my bag and tried to walk through the river to the other side, but I underestimated the current and was pushed a short way downstream. I hit a lot of rocks, but I didn't get seriously injured. When the water got deeper and calmer I found my footing and walked up to shore and started digging on the hot sand.

The spring water is hotter if you just dig for it because then it doesn't mix with the water from the river and get cooled down. I put a rock in the hole that I dug to heat it up. It got pretty hot pretty fast.

I talked to some Indian guys who asked where I was from and where Corinna was from. They were okay.

I waded across to the other side of the river and started digging again. I called Corinna over and got her to hold a hot rock that I had put in a hole. I think she dropped it and swore. That was funny.

I told her that I didn't want to leave until she had at least gotten her calves wet, because it was silly to come all the way out to the river and not swim in it. It took me a while to realize that she wasn't reluctant to get wet, she was reluctant to get dirty. I have to admit, the water did look kinda nasty.

I noticed a bridge over the river and how wobbly it was and I said we could leave if she went on that with me, but she didn't want to do that, either. Eventually she caved and went in the water. I took another refreshing dip and then told her that we could go, but first I wanted to shake the bridge. I ran up and shook the bridge. It was not as wobbly as it looked. It was hardly exciting.

I went back to Corinna and told her to wait by the bank for a bit while I got changed in the car. I said I'd miscall her when I was done.

She walked to the car before I miscalled her, but I already had my pants on. I asked her why she hadn't waited and she said that nobody takes that long to change. I told her the car was cramped and asked what if she saw me changing. She just did that thing where she blows air through her lips in exasperation. I dropped the subject.

We got back on the road and started driving again. Corinna told me about the dead fish she saw, and also about the dead cat she saw. Kuala Woh had quite a few dead things. Hannah and Jan and my mum went there once and there was a dead snake. Well, it was alive when they got there, but it crawled in the engine and so that's why the car makes a funny noise when it goes too fast.

And that is all I'll write about for today. I like this, pacing my blogging. I'm afraid that, by the time I get around to writing about the long conversation about sex that we had on the way back, I will have forgotten most of the details. The fact is, though, that I already have, and besides I told her that I wouldn't tell anyone until she left the country. If I do tell someone before she goes, she gets to tell everyone something that I'd rather not have everyone hear about that she knows.

I'll continue this after work tomorrow. Shit, after tomorrow there'll only be Friday. That's only two days to write about the next... five hours? Dang.

And it's after tomorrow again. Here we go.

So we were back on the road going up Cameron Highlands, and we were talking about stuff. It was a long road. It was very curvy. There were a lot of dogs on it. It was difficult to overtake people. On two occasions there were fallen branches blocking the road and I had to drive on the wrong lane to get past them. On one of the occasions I scratched the car against it pretty badly.

I can't remember what we talked about. I guess it's for the best. I've lost the inspiration to write this post. It was perhaps not the best idea to spread it over so many days. Oh well, might as well finish it for the sake of finishing it.

Um, at one point on the way to Batu Caves we talked about Corinna's friends and why her friend who slept with basically anyone would not sleep with Asians. I don't know why I remembered that or why I'm putting that here and up the story a few dozen paragraphs where it belongs, but there you go. Anyway, back to the part in the story where we're going up the curvy road.

We passed the cloudbank and kept going. It was quite high up. We rolled down the windows and the air was cool. That was nice. Eventually we saw a really big strawberry and we were in Cameron Highlands.

There was a town and we followed the road and we came across a big brownish-orange lake. Next to it was the Lakeview Hotel. It looked like Europe. We parked and got out and took pictures, then we went in to get a map from reception. Corinna went to use the toilet and I sat down in a very comfortable chair in front of a fire place and wished that I lived there. On our way out we saw someone taking scones and tea to a room. That hotel is now one of my favourite places in Malaysia. It even had a typewriter.

We checked the map and drove down the road to a tea house which overlooked a tea plantation. The tea plantation was vast and cool and beautiful. I ate some scones and had some strawberry tea while Corinna ate a slice of carrot cake and drank some plain tea. I thought it was a bit pointless to go all the way there to drink normal tea, but oh well.

I washed my hands and even the water felt like Europe. It was so cold and nice. I really like Cameron Highlands.

We went for a walk in the tea plantation. On our way in, two Dutch tourists passed us, so in addition to the trees, the smell, the temperature, and the air, for a brief moment it sounded like Holland, too. That was nice.

There was a sign that forbade people from plucking the tea leaves, so I plucked a sprig of pine or something instead. It was from I tree that I didn't see much elsewhere but it smelled very nice. I dropped it halfway through our walk and I was sad because it really did smell nice.

We talked about how I had told the girls I liked that I liked them. I think Corinna said that I shouldn't do that any more. I can't remember, though.

We took some pictures in the tea. I tried to climb up a hill but I didn't get very far. I got quite wet from all the dew and such on the leaves. It was quite drizzly.

After we got out of the tea plantation we drove back down to try and find a strawberry place, but they were closed. I pulled over across from the Lakeview Hotel and let Corinna drive.

On the way down we talked about sex. Midway through the conversation, Corinna told me that if I told anyone anything she'd said, she'd kill me. I told her that I wouldn't say anything until she left the country. She said that was alright. I told her something embarrassing about myself so if I betrayed her trust then she could betray mine.

I learned a lot about sex during that drive. I really wish I lived in Germany. Malaysia seems so boring. And the women are pretty sexually repressed here; Corinna was shocked to find that none of my friends had ever masturbated or experienced an orgasm and they all thought oral sex was gross. (I'm going to go ahead and assume that I'm allowed to talk about Corinna's reactions to what I said. That could lead to trouble. I should probably cut this short.)

The rain got worse and the sky got dark and our windows started to fog up. It was difficult to see out of them due to all the condensation, and we struggled with that for the rest of the drive. Corinna got pretty upset with the windshield for being so crap.

On the way down, I took out my laser and shined it out the window of the car and that was fun. I couldn't hit any of the nearby mountains with the beam, but I didn't mind.

We talked about vibrators and pornography and (loss of) virginity and Corinna's "type" and herpes and contraceptives and many many other things that nobody else would talk to me about so that was nice. I'd list more but I'm probably already to close to saying something I shouldn't, so I'll stop. Also I can't really remember much of the conversation.

We got back home and I said goodnight to Corinna and think I went on the computer for a bit and then I went to bed. I'm not sure. I know I felt quite depressed and lonely for some reason that night. That tends to happen after I spend a lot of time with people and then I suddenly stop being around them. The transition usually isn't so quick and it usually isn't after spending only one day with a person.

Oh well.

Hey, I'm done.

Actually, I'm not. We also went to Pizza Hut after we got back to the city but before we got home. Corinna was happy because she had been craving pizza all day. She'd never eaten in Pizza Hut before. We ordered too much food and I had a slice of pizza and it was good. I liked it. We didn't finish everything we ordered and Corinna wanted to pay for me, but I didn't want to let a girl pay for my meal so we split the bill. She ended up paying more but then again I did eat a lot less.

Okay now I think I'm done.

Friday Night Clubbing in Fragmented Thoughts (Also the Evening After)

Well I had thought this was going to be in fragmented thoughts, but that didn't really work out so well. It's still fragmented, but the style of this is still conventional enough that I didn't save much time at all. Oh well.

I have been procrastinating this post for too long. It's almost eight now, so I'll only have an hour to write this.

Clubbing on Friday was fun. Well, for the first four hours, anyway.

After I got home from work I took a quick shower and got changed and then I went with Corinna to Amanda's house. We waited and watched a National Geographic show about large crocodiles for a while.

Joanna, Amanda, and Kaminie showed up eventually with two of Amanda's cousins. One of them was named Jose. I don't know who the other guy was.

Everyone went in another car except Corinna and me, who stayed in our car as we went to pick up Milan. I drove over a bump too fast because the other car was in a big rush and we were following them.

The drive to the club was uneventful.

When I parked the car, we were approached by a jaga kereta fellow, so we paid him five bucks not to scratch our car. Corinna said that would never happen in Germany.

When we got to the club we got in for free because it was lady's night or we were on the guest list or something. The girls went to get free drinks and I decided I wasn't going to drink anything because everyone else was drinking and I didn't want Corinna to be the designated driver because I wanted to see her drunk.

I spent RM80 on drinks somehow anyway. The guys bought a beer tower and I pitched in, even though I didn't drink any. It was a Carlsberg anyway, so whatever. I also went up to the bar to get Corinna a refill but they made me pay for it because I was not a girl. I also bought a coke.

I encouraged Corinna to take advantage of the free drinks, so she ended up having fourteen of them. She had thirteen whiskeys-and-coke and a single vodka-and-lime, which she thought was disgusting. She let me have a sip of the latter and I liked it.

The whole club was pretty empty when we arrived. The dance floor was empty for quite a while. After a while two girls from the VIP section went up to dance. They had nice bodies but crap faces. That theme continued with the next group of people up on the dance floor. They went back down after a while. Something happened that made a whole big group go up, and then soon other people were going up, and then things started to get fun.

We danced. The first time the whole group of us except Corinna went up because she didn't feel like being watched by everyone or something, so after a while I went down to convince her to join us, but it took me a while to find her and when I finally did locate her everyone else had gotten off the floor. I told her that next time we went up she'd have to go, so she agreed.

Throughout the night Corinna told me how shit the club was compared to the ones she'd been to in Europe. I heard a lot about Ibiza. Later on she also gave me tips for when I was out with ladies, three of which I remember. The first was to get a polo shirt and pop the collar, because girls dig that for some reason. I know polo shirts are great. I told her I'd buy some with my next pay cheque. The second tip was to keep my hands out of my pockets because when girls see a guy with his hands in his pockets they think he's playing with himself. The third tip (actually, she said it was the "first rule") was to never ever do anything with an unconscious girl. I thought that last tip was a bit unnecessary since that's actually rape and I'm pretty sure I would never rape someone, but she stated it anyway. On Sunday I'd figure out why she was so insistent on that last tip.

Anyway, eventually we went up dancing a second time and that was fun. At one point we danced back-to-back and I thought she enjoyed that because we did it for quite a while, but every time after that for the rest of the night when I wanted to ask her if she liked it or not, I was always interrupted. In the end she asked me if I really liked it, and I said I was only doing it because I thought she really liked it, and then on the car drive back home when it was just the two of us she said that it was fun. I really actually did like it, though; dancing back-to-back with Corinna was the best part of my night. It might have been the best part of my week but then I had such a good time on Sunday. Actually, Sunday is the start of another week so I guess dancing back-to-back with Corinna really was the best part of my week.

I met my colleagues, Reena and someone else, at the club. They came in at one-something and when I asked them why they had come with only an hour or two before closing time, they informed me that the club was open until five in the morning that day, so I learned something there. Reena had been buddied up with me at work when she was nearing the end of her training. She still uses my computer in the mornings, I think. Anyway, her and her friend looked very very sexy on the dance floor. I enjoyed their dancing very much. They kept offering me drinks for a while but after I refused a few times they stopped. Well, actually, I had a few sips, but I didn't finish a glass of anything. I feel proud of myself for that.

Anyway the pattern of the night seemed to be that I would talk (yell, actually, since it was quite loud in there) to Corinna or Amanda for a bit, then the girls would go to the toilet or go off to get drinks and I'd stand in the alcove near the store room and rub two coins together while thinking, then when the girls came back I'd talk a bit more and then a nice song would come on and we'd go dance and then we'd come back when lousy songs came on and so it would repeat.

I asked Corinna which guy she'd want to dance with most in the whole club, and after the obligatory "Of course I'd want to dance with you, Shaun" line, she told me that there really wasn't anyone that handsome there. I told her to just pick the least ugly guy, but she couldn't find him either. Apparently Asians weren't her type. Too short for her.

At one point we went up to dance for a while with my colleagues instead of my friends from college, but they only seemed interested in each other so we let them be and moved down a bit, and then I turned around and noticed that Corinna was dancing with someone else, which I thought was odd, and when she didn't turn around I moved off to join my college friends and when I glanced over and saw that she was still dancing with the same guy, I got off the dance floor and went to sit down for a while and rub coins together.

Corinna came down after a while and I congratulated her on finding the least ugly guy in the club, but she told me that she wasn't dancing with him because he was the least ugly; she just thought he was a good dancer. She thought he was a weirdo, though, because he kept asking her to go low or something.

Anyway once I knew that he was a weirdo I felt pretty okay and I went back to talking and waiting and then going off to dance, but when we were back on the dance floor she was dancing with him again and then they were swapping numbers and I thought screw it and got off the floor again so I could go sulk in a corner or whatever.

Corinna and I talked at some point, probably earlier on, about how annoying it was that the emcees kept talking over the music. They didn't let the music play uninterrupted, someone always had to chip in and say something or other. At least they let Sweet Child O' Mine play to the chorus, though; last time we were there they ended it before the verse. Also, they played the theme from Outsourced. I'm not sure what the theme of this paragraph is.

Jose told me to go dance with Corinna because everyone could see how down I had gotten. I told him that I would and I did, but after that I kinda just sat around and waited for the night to end. I got pretty tired. At four fifteen-ish I decided that we could go, so I told everyone that we were going. Joanna wanted to do one last thing with someone. Milan was practically asleep for the last two hours or whatever so he had no problems with going, and the rest of them... I forget what happened with the rest of them but at four twenty-ish everyone seemed good to go, so I left. I said goodbye to Reena and her friend and I got a hug and was told to drive safe. That was nice.

When I exited the club I noticed that nobody was behind me, so I sat by the stairs and waited for them to come out. I texted them and said I was outside.

Amanda's other cousin had gone home in his own car so everyone (Joanna, Amanda, Jose, Kaminie) was going back in the car with Milan and Corinna and I. Also, we met Roshaan and Joshua at the club. That was earlier on but they left with us.

Everyone was out except for Jose, but then he went back in to say goodbye to someone. Everyone was quite drunk except for me (because I hadn't drank anything) and Kaminie (I don't know why) and Corinna (she's German; even after fourteen drinks she was barely buzzed). Milan walked down the stairs so I had to follow him to make sure he didn't hurt himself. Either Joshua or Kaminie came down as well, and then the rest joined us from the elevator eventually. I was quite annoyed to notice that the guy Corinna had been dancing with was there, too.

I could tell right away that he was going to be annoying. He kept asked me where I was from, so I told him Bangsar, and then he asked me where I was from "originally", so I told him Bangsar because my dad was Chinese and my mum was from the Netherlands, and then he asked me where I was from "originally" again, and then when I told him Bangsar the third time he gave up on trying to understand and just went back to bugging Corinna. Except she wasn't bothered, as I later found out. She just kinda tuned out of everything he said and she ended the night under the impression that he was a "nice guy". Ha!

I thought we were all headed to the car to go back the same, but Joanna and Kaminie broke off to go back somehow else. We were all meeting in Devi's, though, because Amanda wanted cheese naan. Amanda always wants cheese naan when she's drunk.

It was a bit tricky to get Milan and Jose to the car as they were both pretty well out from all the drinking, but Joshua helped us so we were grateful for that. Amanda sat between them and Corinna was up in shotgun, and I don't know why I'm mentioning seating arrangements but there you go.

Anyway, we got to Devi's and Amanda and Jose hobbled off to go order. Corinna and I stayed by the car while we watched Milan puke. Corinna pointed out how she could tell that he hadn't eaten anything because his vomit was entirely liquid. It meant that there wasn't any smell, though, so that was alright.

We got to Devi's and I sat down and then Kaminie and Joanna arrived with the dumbass that Corinna was dancing with and two other guys. The dumbass kept saying "trust me" after everything and he kept insisting that Corinna should try nasi lemak because she'd love it even though she'd already told him that she'd tried it and she hated it. He asked us what our favourite countries were and Corinna replied that she didn't have a favourite country, and then he said his favourite country was America and I knew he was full of it. I asked him how many states there were and his reply was "forty plus". Gah, I hate him. The worst bit was that he wasn't mean-spirited or anything, just so freaking oblivious and idiotic and obvious in his intentions.

I asked Joanna if she knew who the dumbass was, but she didn't. She didn't know the other two guys, either. I asked her why she decided to ride back with them if she didn't know who they were, and she said something about Kaminie.

Meanwhile Jose was threatening the dumbass' friend with a fork and the dumbass' friend was also being an obnoxious annoying dumbass. Kaminie looked miserable. Earlier on he had been leaning in near her and it was pretty obvious that he was trying to flirt with her or something but she was having none of it. Oh yeah, when Corinna had mentioned that she as from Germany, this guy's first reaction was to yell "Nazi!". Not as an accusation or anything, it's just that that was the only word in his thick empty skull that he associated with Germany, so he felt that blurting it out was an acceptable reaction. Idiot. Fortunately, Corinna was tuned out because of the other dumbass (Mr Trust Me) so she didn't hear it.

I finished my second limau ice and decided to go have McDonald's instead since they were serving the breakfast menu and the hash browns would be very fresh. I jogged over and there was a group of four girls talking about college or Form 5 or something, but they were the only other people on my side of the counter. Behind the counter it took the staff a minute to find someone to take my order. I didn't mind though, because it only cost RM10 and I got to eat from the breakfast menu for dinner.

After I finished my McMuffin and hash, I took my orange juice and walked back to Devi's. Along the way I was contemplating whether I should tell the dumbass about Corinna telling me on the way to the car from the club that she wasn't going to sleep with him or even text him back. I don't know why I decided against it, but I guess he wouldn't've understood no matter how clear I made it anyway.

When I got back, the dumbass was still talking to Corinna and she was still semi-ignoring him. She was responding to what he was saying, but I'm pretty sure her mind was elsewhere because there is no other explanation for her conclusion that he was a "nice guy". At one point he leaned over and whispered something in her ear and her response was "Okay, A) he's not my boyfriend, and B) he's not my best friend" so that was a thing.

I asked Amanda why she was eating nasi lemak instead of cheese naan and she said something but I didn't hear what. It sounded sad, though. Everyone was in a lousy mood except the two dumbasses, because they were the ones ruining everything, and Corinna, because she had zoned out or whatever. Even the dumbasses' cousin (or friend) looked like he was feeling lousy, probably because he realized at what shitty company he was keeping.

Finally everyone finished their food, so we got to leave two dumbasses and their cousin behind and go back. I asked why Joanna and Kaminie had even decided to ride with them anyway, and apparently it was because the dumbass that liked Kaminie had been so persistently annoying that they decided to ride with him just to shut him up. I thought that was phenomenally stupid because, I dunno, they might have just driven off someplace and raped them or whatever, but Joanna said that Kaminie apparently knew them from somewhere so it was okay.

Milan threw up a second time while I was waiting in the car. It was very convenient of him to only spew immediately before and after journeys. It kept the car nice and clean. Milan is a considerate dude, even when he's drunk.

In the car, Amanda got pissed at Kaminie for bringing them to Devi's, Joanna got pissed at Amanda when Amanda told her to stop defending the dumbasses (Joanna wasn't defending them, she just didn't want everyone yelling), and I was pissed at Corinna for giving that dumbass her number and not recognizing how stupid they were.

Apparently the dumbass that liked Kaminie had been punching her all night in some retarded form of flirting, and so Amanda said that she'd punch him if he hit her one more time, so he dared her to, so she slapped him, so he said that that wasn't a punch, so she said it was a "preview to a punch", and then he said if she could hit him then he could hit her, then Jose said not to touch his cousin, and then he said something to Amanda, and then the dumbass thought he was talking to him or something, and then Jose raised his fork and started threatening him, and then Mr Trust Me kept chiming in to try and impress Corinna who had stopped caring a long time ago, and then I left and went to McDonald's. So that's what was happening on that side of the table.

Anyway eventually everyone in the car agreed that the dumbasses were dumbasses, and then I dropped Milan off at his house and everyone else off at Amanda's. Joanna told me that we could maybe do it again on her birthday, which I wrongly guessed as being on the 31st of December. It was actually on the 30th of November.

On the way back home with Corinna, I told her about the "nazi!" dumbass and tried to convince her that it was stupid to give the other dumbass her phone number, and although she agreed that the other guy was really stupid she still stuck by her decision to trade numbers with the guy. I told her she'd regret it. I was wrong, though; the next day she hadn't received anything from him so I conceded that she was right and maybe it was okay to give out contact details to dumbasses.

We got home at six in the morning and the sky looked very nice. We said goodnight and I took a shower. Jan knocked on the door right when I started, because he had just woken up and needed to get ready for BB. I told him to just wait and then I brushed my teeth and told him and Ian about Corinna not being drunk after 14 drinks and about the dumbass she had danced with and then they left for BB and I went on Tumblr for a very short while and I went to sleep at seven.

I woke up at six and had pasta. Corinna joined me in the kitchen and we talked until my dad came home with Uncle Shark. The four of us talked about Aquaria for a while, then Corinna and I went out to the dining room to play checkers. The board I had bought was too big. It was 10X10 instead of 8X8. Corinna had never played before so it was doubly awkward. We didn't finish the game because it got too boring and we forgot whose turn it was.

Corinna told me about the headache she had when she woke up in the morning. Susanna had walked in twice just to stare at her and that didn't help. Anyway she said she eventually woke up to take a shower and go back to bed, and then a little later she went to the pool for a while but went to sleep afterwards anyway. So I had eleven hours of lovely sleep in my bed and she had ten and a half hours of sleep in her bed and also by the pool and such.

Jan stopped by and I told him that Corinna had complained to me the night before that I was the only one that talked to her. Jan felt pretty bad but Corinna said she wasn't complaining, she was just saying. Jan defended himself anyway by pointing out that I talk so much that it just seems like Hannah and Ian and he don't say much, but really they're talking a normal amount and my excessive talking is making them seem quiet by comparison. Then he left.

Corinna and I went through all the pictures on her camera and I took a bunch of them to upload later. They were the ones from Batu Caves with snakes and the big lizard and such, like these two:

After that, Corinna went on Facebook and she showed me a picture of the stripper clown from Ibiza with cock ring and the gigantic penis. After that she showed me pictures that her dad sent from the Middle East of the gun store and the lavish golden bathroom and the gold ATM and such. She also showed me pictures from some parties and her friends' profiles and her ex-boyfriend's car crash and her castle school. She told me loads of stuff about Germany and by the end of it all I was very jealous of where she lived.

We watched some videos from the Midnight Beast on YouTube and then we watched some of Tenacious D and some of my favourite music and her favourite music and soon enough four hours had passed and it was eleven o'clock, so Corinna went back to bed and I went to my computer.

I wanted to blog but I didn't. I think I just got kinda depressed for some reason and I didn't do much except e-mail Sara and delete a bunch of photos from my phone and put some more Taylor Swift on it while trying to figure out how to compress songs. I went to bed at five.

I woke up at nine and then Sunday began, but I'll write about that tomorrow.

On Sunday night I was also sitting at my computer for a while feeling depressed even though I had a really nice time. It's weird. I think it's because I start missing the fun times the moment they end, and that's not good for me.

Updating for Updating's Sake (and of Course this Grew into a Longer Post than Intended)

I have a lot of unread items on my Google Reader feed. I have three weeks of webcomics to catch up on. I have two weeks to blog about. I'll do that all later. Like, end of the month later or something.

I'm going clubbing tonight with Amanda and Milan and the rest. They said it's cool if I bring Corinna along, so I'm going to see if she wants to come.

Tomorrow we're going to Gua Tempurung, and then after that we're going to Cameron Highlands. We're using my mum's car because she's in the Netherlands with Hannah for my grandmother's funeral. I spoke to my Oma a week before she went. She sounded small and a little bit confused. She's with her husband now, I guess, so that's nice.

I don't have any more maternal grandparents.

Yesterday (technically, today), I was at the office for a long time. My shift ended at nine, I stayed on until ten watching the new Glee, and then I called Sara on Skype and talked to her for the next three hours. There was only one other person at the office. I moved all the abandoned chairs to my area of the cubicle farm. I felt like a furniture king. Anyway, I decided to hang up at 1:30am so I could go home and get some sleep, so I did. My card wouldn't work in tagging me out, so I had to get the other guy to let me out. I then realized that I had left my keys on my desk, so I had to yell from outside for him to let me back in. He was a patient dude, luckily.

When I got to the car, there was a dog napping underneath it. It had a hurt paw. It looked really cute. I took two pictures, but I can't upload them right now because I didn't bring my transfer cable to work.

When I got home I lost Ian's USB stick. I went back to the car to look for it, but it wasn't there. When I came back upstairs it was lying on the welcome mat. I felt a bit silly when I noticed that.

Jan was still awake, listening to the Ricky Gervais show. I took a shower and went to sleep at two-thirty.

The next morning I went through my morning routine, ate some sausages and bacon with Corinna and Aunty Rosie, and checked my e-mail. Then I went to work.

So far work has been okay. It took me a while to log in because of some technical hiccups, but it just meant that I didn't have to answer calls for the first twenty minutes. We were supposed to have some important clients visiting, so I wasn't on Tumblr or Conquer Club the whole day. For my break I went up to the roof and I saw that I had a text from Amanda asking if I wanted to go clubbing. I like getting drunk and seeing my friends get drunk, so I said I would.

When I got back I went up to the ops team to talk to them about something, and someone had left their phone on their desk. Nina (the nice lady in charge of approval for lunch and breaks) wanted to hide the phone. I asked if she wanted me to take it down to Sukarno (my boss) when I went back to my desk, since apparently it's his last day and it would be a nice (albeit short-lived) going-away present. She said she did, so I did. I'm not sure what he's done with it.

The fire escape in this building has "no smoking" signs on every floor, but even during an actual fire you're still more likely to die of smoke inhalation on the stairs than you are inside the actual floors. I guess illiteracy is like mouth cancer and coughing: just another side-effect of cigarettes. I'd pity smokers if they weren't all so stupid about their mortality.

I only really have to write about the weekends. I need to write about Halloween and Batu Caves and Megamind and Tropicana City Mall and that's pretty much it. Should be pretty simple. Work days are all the same anyway.

Oh. I also need to upload all the pictures of me with the snakes and the bearded dragon and Catholic Jesus up at Batu Caves. They're on Corinna's camera; I have to remember to get those from her sometime.

I don't know what my opinions are regarding Sara Elizabeth Madren. On the one hand I really really like talking to her, on the other hand I can never decide if I'm infatuated with her or not. I'm pretty sure I will be tonight, because I'll be drunk and I'm infatuated with every pretty girl when I'm drunk.

I'm running out of money. After tithing RM400 to Beacon Life Training Centre to help buy stuff to help the special needs kids, I think I'll only have, like, RM300 left. I'm probably going to spend RM200 tonight and maybe half that tomorrow (not counting petrol), so I'm going to have to starve a bit near the end of the month. Oh well.

Man, it's gonna suck to be unemployed again. It's gonna suck worse to be in university, but at least I'll be able to make new friends. It's the in-between period that'll get me. I'll be pretty bored. I should get a laptop and install all the awesome games of the past three years on it. That should tide me through.

I need more money.

KLCC Park with Corinna, and Other Things

It's 4:32am. Wow.

Okay, wow. I'm tired. Um, this will be "short". It may even be short.

Milan, I'm still blogging.

World, I love you.

Hannah, it's good to know that you're still reading this. You can tell me how lame it still is later.

Let's do this with numbers because limits make things easier:

1) I saw a rat at Restaurant Emas. Corinna was the first person to spot it, but my mum and I couldn't see it so we told her that it was probably a squirrel since we've never seen a rat before. Mostly we just get cockroaches. Corinna hates cockroaches. They've been crawling in her shoes and such ever since she got here.

Anyway the rat came out again and it was indeed a rat. My mum called Mr Wong and he said that he was trapping and killing rats tonight. I asked my mum if she would let me keep a stray rat as a pet if I cleaned it up and immunized it first. She said wouldn't. She wouldn't let me have a snake, either. My mum can be a real buzzkill sometimes.

Corinna asked why I would want a rat. They are cute and intelligent and I could train one to sit on my shoulder when I'm at the computer. That would be great.

2) I'm always so lonely when I'm not with people. I want a girlfriend so badly (or is it bad? Which one means that the mechanism which allows me to want is broken? Whichever it is, I meant to type the other one. Or maybe I didn't. I don't know. I don't really care. I do really care. Gah). I just want a friend badly, actually.

3) I'm sitting in my room wearing an oversized jacket and a blanket over my legs. Why don't I just raise the temperature on the air-conditioner instead?

4) I went to KLCC park with Corinna. It was nice.

After dinner we talked for a bit, but then Mr Wong took our empty plates away and our drinks ran out and we had no reason left to be there, so I asked Corinna if she wanted to go to KLCC and take pictures and stuff. She said yes.

We went upstairs so that she could get her stuff and I could put on some jeans and shoes. I also got my laser pen and she kept that in her purse. I also got Ian's car keys. I asked him if he wanted to come but he didn't. I think it was because he had work today but it might also be because he was lazy.

I parked Ian's car in this parking lot near the Bangsar LRT station. Corinna thought it looked like a scary place. I would have agreed with her, but I knew that it wasn't.

I paid the dude in charge of the place three ringgits and he gave us a receipt or a ticket or something. I had exactly three ringgit in my wallet, but I paid him with my RM10 emergency note because I thought that the price was five ringgit. That's not anything you needed or wanted to know, but it's something I wanted to write down. Don't worry, I put another RM10 ringgit note in later.

We took the LRT to KLCC.

At KLCC, I bought a large passionfruit drink from Aunt Anne's (Or is it Annie's?) pretzels. Corinna bought a small. We talked about pretzels while waiting in line for our turn. They don't have Aunt(ie/y) Ann(e's/ei's) in Germany.

We went to the park and walked around. Corinna liked the soft paths they have there. It reminded me about that story I once heard of that one king (or emperor; I can't remember if it was a Western parable or an Oriental one) who wanted the roads paved with leather so it wouldn't hurt his feet when he had to travel. One of his servants suggested that he just get nicer shoes instead, so he did. I can't remember what the moral was, probably something like "Don't do awesome things that will benefit everyone when you can just do something that'll benefit only yourself." Anyway I told Corinna how they had rubber paths for the blind in Brickfields so they could tell by feeling where they were. She thought that was a neat idea.

We talked about our dads. We talked about our countries. We talked about the pollution. We talked about each other (a little). We talked about the path. I had a good time. She didn't hate it.

We went to the playground. I tried to swing but some uniformed bitch lady just trying to earn a living whistled at me to get off.

I found another swing further inside. I swung on it and Corinna sat around and took pictures, like this one:

After swinging, I went to the monkey bars and hung upside down on those for a while. Corinna took another picture of me.

I took a picture of her as well. Scroll back up and see if you can figure out which one it was.

I would have taken a picture of myself, but Corinna told me a guard was coming. It was actually just a concerned parent, but by the time I had found that out I was already off the monkey bars. A real guard showed up shortly afterwards to say that they were closing the park since it was ten o'clock.

Corinna and I went to the wading pool and took some pictures. It was loud in there, so we did not hear the whistling. The whistling was coming from a guard who wanted us to leave. Apparently their job is to make sure no fun occurs on park grounds.

There was a mosque in the park. We would've gone in but we weren't sure where we could put our shoes. We talked about religion and how each religion has its own crazy people and people who don't care too much and people in between. Corinna and I are in the second category. We changed the subject after three guards in motorcycles came by.

Since the park was closed, we walked back to the train station. Along the way I told Corinna about the time Jan had seen a homeless dude with a huge hole in his pants that everything was hanging out of. Corinna said Jan was probably staring. I hope Corinna thinks that Jan is gay. That would be amusing.

We took the LRT back. There was a Canadian couple next to us. The were visiting a friend in Bangkok and had stopped by Malaysia because it was close to Thailand and not as full of prostitutes of indeterminate gender. They had come to KL after spending some time relaxing and feeding eagles and rays in Langkawi. I told them about the time I had taken a picture with a large stingray while scuba diving in Redang. I also told them to visit the KL tower because of the view and because of the two-headed turtle. I showed them a picture of the two-headed turtle. Corinna told them about her time in Vancouver. They were nice. They had been to Cameron Highlands. I told them that that was where we were probably going the next day.

When I got to Bangsar station I took out the laser pointer and dicked around with it a bit. It was an awesome purchase.

We took the car back. There was nobody in the parking lot.

Back at home I told my dad that I wanted to go to Cameron Highlands. He said I might as well pick Jan and Hannah up from Ipoh. I said okay. He asked me whose car I was going to use, because he was using his. I told him I was going to use Ian's, but I'd need money for petrol. He said to forget about it. I suggested maybe doing it next Friday. He said that might be a better idea.

Corinna wanted to know what time we were going to Batu Caves. I said that I was waking up at ten-thirty, so one. She laughed.

I like Corinna. I'll miss her when she's gone.

5) Here are some things before I end this post:

a) Work is still work. The weeks pass faster than I thought they would. It's already payday.

b) I wish I was older. Then I could've had a slightly better chance with Effie, Elo, Amanda (Ha! Better by, like, 0.01¹⁰⁰¹⁰⁰%), Juria, and I might even have started flirting with Corinna by now.

c) I spent an impressively nerdy amount of time getting that superscript just right, and I still probably fucked it up.

d) What did I do on Thursday? Nothing, unless sleeping at 4am and waking up at 5pm counts as something. Oh, I guess I played counterstrike against a bunch of bots with knives and shields. That was fun.

e) Oh yeah! Amanda called me on Tuesday and I met her and Milan at Devi's and we talked and then we went to eat ice cream. We talked about her boyfriend in Texas for a while and then I spent the next hour or so insulting her religion. I was a shitfaced dickhead (her words), but her religion sucks so I still feel justified. Sanctity of life is bullshit and arguing against contraception on the basis of that is even bullier shit. Or shittier bull. Whatever.

f) The perfect amount of people for a conversation is four. Two to do all the talking, and two to exchange knowing glances at what perfect arses the first two are making of themselves.

g) I got infatuated with a girl over the internet again. Fuck; I'm pathetic.

h) Okay I have to end this post soon. I want to Google pathos.

i) Oh my goodness it's six forty-eight in the morning.

j) Bugs are flying into the light of my screen. I'm going to eat one.

k) That tasted like hair, dust, and ick. I feel like a wimpy Bear Grylls.

l) I can still feel it in my throat. I think it's stuck. I'm going to go get a drink.

I'm Tired and I Want to Get This Out of The Way Before Bed

Ian quit his job and came to interview for mine on Wednesday. I went out on my lunch break to interrupt his interview.

Wednesday was also the day I got my pay. There had been a lot of delays leading up to that point.

I was quite happy that it had arrived. It would still take a while to clear, though. I went to deposit it but then I realized that I needed my account number on the back. It was a bit of a hassle to get that since I had changed my password for my Maybank2u and all that, but I got it eventually.

Money is great. I've already budgeted it.

RM50 is for gambling (poker only, so I can only lose as much as I've put in), RM500 is being saved, RM160 is being tithed, RM350 goes on celebrating it (I was going to buy Outback for my bosses tonight, but they took too long to get the cheque ready for me so it didn't clear in time for that. I'll be buying McDonald's for the whole department on Monday instead), RM300 goes on food for the month, and there are other expenses that I've budgeted for like movies and stuff that I can't remember at the moment.

Hannah made cookies today. They are really tasty.

While she made the cookies, I made some oobleck to play with. Oobleck is the funnest fluid.

Thursday and today are my off days. I woke up really late on Thursday, and I slept really early (in the morning. It was five A.M.). Today I woke up at ten because Susanna was playing her music too loud. At least she wasn't playing Barney songs this time. I hate that purple reptilian idiot and all his stupid friends.

I've downloaded a lot of Elvis to listen to recently. Elvis is great.

I've been on Tumblr too much recently. I love the "ask" feature. I get to know more about all these strangers (and some of my friends). Most of the time it's just silly this-or-that, but sometimes I'll ask something open-ended and I'll get a thoughtful and interesting reply. Also sometimes they ask me questions back. I enjoy answering those.

Hannah will have to give up her room next week because we have a daughter of one of my dad's friends' coming over to stay for a while. She's twenty years old (which sounded like a lot the first time I heard it but then I realized that that's only two years older than me and one year younger than Amanda and exactly the same age as Ian, which makes her seem less distant somehow) and she's from Germany. I'll end up referencing the war or the football rivalry and things will get awkward, I just know it. If I miraculously manage not to be a bumbling idiot, it should be pretty cool. The last time we had a guest from Europe was four years ago when our cousin and his friend came over during the 2006 World Cup. They went down to Singapore for the finale. They were cool. The guest room was frigid when they were staying over, though. They put the air conditioning on the lowest temperature and you could feel the cold as you walked past the door. Malaysian weather is not kind to those used to the more temperate northern climates.

I'm still waiting for my cheque to clear but my dad transferred RM700 to my bank account so I have money again and I don't have to starve at work. When the cheque clears I'm sending RM765 over to him (RM15 interest and RM50 from a previous loan).

I won RM7.50 from making silly bets with Jan this afternoon. It was too easy, so I let him win it all back. Hannah only made two bets and she managed to break even.

I thought I would spend more time playing RuneScape after getting a job, but that didn't happen.

Amanda went to Indonesia and came back and I didn't even notice because nobody told me. Joanna went to Greece and I only found out a few hours before she left. She didn't know what the isle of Lesbos was. I'm disappointed in her. I'm also jealous of her, she's going to be cruising around the Mediterranean for almost twelve days.

I've only got four days left before I have to buy Milan and Amanda some ice cream. Dang. Oh well, at least the first time after that is going to feel awesome.

Joanna's videos of me did not get enough hits for me to have to buy her McDonald's. I still owe her RM10 for uploading them on time, though.

My tooth hurts. I think it's because I've been clenching my jaw too tight.

I'm not sure if I'm desperate enough to date a fifteen-year-old. I hope I'm not. A man's got to have principles. Sixteen is the limit. Seventeen after my next birthday.

If Hannah starts dating a sixteen-year-old now I would feel that there was ass to be kicked. A fifteen-year-old would probably be risking the same fate unless he/she was awesome.

My parents watched An Idiot Abroad with me. It's great.

I love my one month of free premium at Conquer Club. I think I'll use some of my final pay cheque to buy a whole year. If I'm doing that then I'm also going to buy some Dinosaur Comic T-shirts. I want the Time Traveller's Essentials and the "Feelings are boring, kissing is awesome" one. I'll also donate a couple dozen dollars to JoCo as thanks for all the songs he let me steal.

I have more to say, but I think I'll end this so that I can go to bed sooner.

Oh yeah, my boss needed extra people to come in to work today but it's my day off so I told him that I was "kinda busy" today. I only went to Subway and I spent the rest of the day on the internet. Was I lying? I hope I wasn't lying.

Let's Go Do Something We'll Regret

Yesterday was, um... Hang on.

Okay yesterday was Saturday. But it's only been Sunday for a little over half an hour.

Friday. Let's talk about Friday.

I woke up in the afternoon and after getting ready for the day, I took my motorcycle down to Devi's to meet Joanna and Amanda. Joanna and Amanda were on the phone when I arrived. I said "Hi" and Amanda asked "Is that your father?" and I said "What?" and then not much else happened.

I talked to Joanna while waiting for Amanda to get off the phone. While that happened, two attractive white girls walked in and talked about whether they were going to stay in Devi's and sit at the table in front of us or leave, never to be seen again. They decided to stay, so that was nice.

Also, it was my dad at the other table. He was at Devi's having lunch with my mum and I had no idea at the time that he was going to be there. Devi's is like some kind of event horizon for coincidental meetings. Every time we're there we have to see at least one person we already know. The food's still pretty lame, though.

This is a picture of my father. I'm not sure why I took it.

Anyway, when Amanda finished her conversation with her mother over the phone, I told Jo and her how I hot I thought the girls in front of us were ("very") and how badly I wanted to talk to them ("very"). I told them about how I had missed opportunities to talk to pretty girls at Pizza Hut on Ian's birthday and at the bowling alley at KLGCC and such, and how I really wanted to talk make sure this didn't end up being another thing I regretted not doing anything about.

Amanda and Joanna told me that I needed to get the perfect pick-up line or something before I approached them, which I thought was ridiculous. I told them I just needed some kind of motivation and then I'd do it. They told me that I couldn't just go up and talk to someone. I told them I could, and I got up and talked to this elderly stranger who was sitting alone at the other side of the restaurant to prove it.

When I got back Joanna and Amanda still thought I needed a pick-up line, but I told them I wasn't looking to pick anyone up. I just wanted to go talk to the girls so that I would not regret not talking to them. I asked Joanna and Amanda to give me some kind of motivation, but they couldn't come up with anything.

The girls at the other table were done with their meal and they were ready to go, so I knew I had to do something soon. Fortunately, Amanda told me that she would let me talk for 10 hours uninterrupted if I went to talk to the girls. That was all the motivation I needed. Before I got up to talk to the girls, I told Amanda that I would only talk for 30 minutes because 10 hours is a bit unrealistic.

I got up and walked over to the table in front. Joanna ran over to my old spot to get a better view. I stood for a few seconds to think of something to say before I finally leaned over and won 30 minutes of uninterrupted rambling.

"Excuse me; my friends over there were wondering how good they looked, and I was wondering if you could help."

Joanna and Amanda were not expecting that at all. When the girls asked which friends, I pointed out Joanna and Amanda for them, and Amanda and Joanna started frantically pointing at each other. When the girls asked which one, I said both. I asked for an objective rating on a scale of one to ten. They were reluctant to answer at first, but I told that my friends would probably never see them again so they wouldn't have to worry about hurting anyone's feelings. They finally settled on a rating of somewhere between seven and eight for both Amanda and Joanna. I thanked them and returned to my table.

I told Jo and Amanda what they had said and they accused the girls of being liars. Whatever, I think seven is a fair judgement for how they were looking that day.

I was very happy that I had talked to the girls since now I wouldn't have any regrets about it. Joanna said it didn't count because I didn't get their names and numbers, but that was never my objective in the first place. It's not like I'd have a chance with them anyway.

After that I rambled on for the 30 minutes that I had won and I enjoyed it. I said a lot of stupid shit, but I think I also said one or two really clever things as well. Overall I'm pleased with how it turned out. Joanna filmed it on her phone, but she hasn't uploaded it yet and I don't think she ever will [edit: she did, the links are in the next post, there are almost an equal amounts of dislikes as likes but somehow being hated by the YouTube community is one of the many, many things that affects my self-esteem]. Amanda and Joanna seemed quite bent on figuring out whether I was gay or not. Women arouse me far more then men do, so I'm gonna go ahead and say that I'm not.

When that was over I drove Joanna and Amanda to Sunway in Amanda's car. We talked about stuff and listened to music and played word association because Joanna and Amanda kept answering "both" or "neither" for This or That, and the game is no fun if people do that.

We dropped Joanna off at her house. Oh yeah, she had a dog. Here's a couple of pictures of it and me:

I look better in the dark and I don't like what that says about me.

After dropping off Joanna I drove back with Amanda, but she was too tired to provide great conversation. I didn't mind though. I let her take a nap while listening to Regina Spektor. The traffic jam was pretty bad. Wanna read something creepy? No? Okay then, because I was just about to say "there's something different about looking at a person when they're asleep. When they're awake you see all their defenses and mannerisms and expressions but when you're asleep you just see... them." Shit, that sounds like that queer vampire's inner monologue from when he was perving on Bella whatsherface as she slept in Twilight.

Amanda woke up and then we went to pick up Geraldine. We parked in an alley and talked about friends and siblings and how Imagine is not a sad song, and then we drove around for a bit. Geraldine got in the car and I let Amanda take the driver's seat, and then I got on my motorcycle and went home.

Ian and I went to the Outback Steakhouse after that.

I heard That's Amore and All Shook Up on the best radio station on Astro and then I went to bed.

I woke up on Saturday at 3:30am. My dad drove my mum to meet up with some people so she could go to Penang for a seminar, and then he drove me to work. We picked up some McDonald's along the way. I had ordered sausage McMuffin with egg meals. I paid for one of them and ate both of them. I talked with my dad and then I went to work.

At work I earned a just little less than RM100 doing this:

Around ten hours later work was over and I was napping outside waiting for Aunty Rosie to arrive and drive me home. I listened to a playlist I had made on my phone specifically for naps. It had taken me something like half an hour to create, but it was so worth it. Naps with music are the best naps.

Back at home I got changed into something less presentable and more comfortable and then I went to sleep. It was five o'clock or thereabouts. When I woke up again it was seven something.

Hannah thinks I have tickets to Paramore or something.

I ate barbecued pork ribs for dinner. Joanna dreamed about Amanda eating pork ribs earlier. It's a coincidence.

I'm tired.

I started a blog on Tumblr today. I have no more followers on my Twitter.

I need to get more space on my phone. I don't have any space left for all the Elvis and additional Jonathan Coulton I want to put on it.

I'm tired and I have to be awake in two and a half hours. Goodnight.

My desk

My contracts (Part-Time, Full-Time, Hannah)

Country Club and Cloverfield

A little over three hours ago, it was Friday. I woke up at four in the afternoon on Friday. Hannah woke me up to ask me if I was going to drive her and Ebony to the KL Golf and Country Club so they could bowl. I asked her when she wanted to leave, and she said right then. I told her that I would need half an hour. We haggled over how much time she'd give me and we compromised at 23 and a half minutes. Or maybe 22 and a half. Whatever.

Anyway, I got up and started reading my Bible, but then my mum said that she would drive them there instead. When I was done with my chapters for the day, I told them to wait for me while I did the stairs and got ready to go out. My mum asked how long it would take, and I said seven minutes, so she agreed. I ended up taking nine.

Jan joined us to go bowling. I bowled terribly at first (12) and ended up bowling better but still terribly after some tips from my mum (54, I think). While we were bowling, a couple of girls were sitting nearby, and I told Jan I'd give him five bucks if he had the balls to go over and talk to them for long enough to get their names. He didn't, but he told me he'd give me three bucks if I were to do the same. I told him that I would right after I finished bowling my next turn. The girls left right as my next turn started. Oh well.

After that we went swimming. Originally I didn't want to swim, but everyone else was swimming and Jan told me that the showers were awesome, so I decided to swim so I would have an excuse to take a hotel-quality shower (I am a huge fan of hot water). The showers were really good. KLGCC has an infinity pool, so it looks pretty cool. I lost my last pair of contact lenses when I opened my eyes to see how near the end of the pool was while swimming underwater, but it wasn't too bad since my contact lens supply was only supposed to last six months and it ended up lasting around a year. It does mean that I'll have to wear my glasses to Nick's farewell party, though. Oh yeah, there were also snails at the pool.

When we got back, Aunty Rosie had made a tasty dinner with great homemade fries. The fries were a bit soggy because we got home late, but they were still great.

I watched Cloverfield again and read all about it. It's still one of my favourite movies and Hud is still the character I still enjoy having been compared with most (the others being Columbus, Sheldon Cooper, and Fogel, in that order). I want to watch it again soon, but with a friend this time.

It's now very late so I'm going to bed again. This time I hope to wake up at around ten. I got a miscall from the lady who owns the dogs when I was swimming. Hopefully she was calling to say that tomorrow I can visit the dogs that I helped rescue. I sent a text for clarification.

I dislike residual feelings of attraction because they make you jealous and petty even when you don't want to be. I'm happy for both of them, really, it's just that sometimes my subconscious is not. My subconscious is a dick.

Movies (Also Some of Last Week)

I watched The Expendables today with Ian, Jan, and El-Hanan. It was awesome. Jan and Hanan thought the dialogue was really shitty, but I thought it was good enough for the type of movie that it was. The action and explosions and gore and one-liners were so great. I haven't had that much fun in a movie in a while.

I also had a lot of fun when I went to see Salt with Joanna on Wednesday. It was a lot smarter and a little more fun than I thought it was going to be. I was pleased that it surprised me. This is the benefit of having low expectations. The only bad bit was that a couple walked into the movie an hour and a half in, right during the twist at the climax in the war room. Who comes in to a movie fifteen minutes before it ends? Fools. Also the movie was very blue and orange, and now that I've started noticing that trend I cannot un-notice it. Oh yeah, we also saw the trailer for Scott Pilgrim vs The World and now I want to watch it even though it'll be coming out many months after the American release and they're probably going to censor out the ex-girlfriend character.

Before I watched Salt with Joanna I bought her phone for RM250. My dad paid for RM150 of it. It is an awesome phone. It can store an unlimited amount of texts, which is the main reason I got it (My old one only held 100 texts for some arbitrary reason), but it also has a music player and a working camera and 2 gigabytes of space which I have almost filled with music and funny pictures.

After I watched Salt, I met up with Elo and Arun in McDonald's to give Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog and an episode of Batman: The Bold and the Brave to Elo. She didn't have her laptop, so she borrowed the pen drive and gave it back to me the next day. Also I discovered that Elo has the same phone as me, which is pretty cool since Arun has one like my old one. Anyway, when I went to pick the pen drive up the next day, I saw a motorcycle that was the same model as mine. It looked cooler, though. I took pictures with my new phone.

While on the subject of Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog, apparently Ian brought the pen drive to some singing practice for BB and they watched the first two acts there. Something interrupted them and then they had to go home and now they will never finish it. Poor BB people.

Also during this week I got Marks and Spencer's underwear and socks. My dad took us to The Gardens to get clothes. I spent most of our time there coming up with CSI Miami-esque puns. Also before that we ate at McDonald's breakfast and that was delicious. Anyway the socks are super comfortable and the underwear will last a long time, so that's nice.

I downloaded a whole bunch of movies, maybe fifteen gigs' worth. Most of them are Disney. Aladdin is my new favourite. Jafaar is a great villain, but still like Scar more. Also The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh are funny and nostalgic and awesome. Also piglet is in 12 Angry Men. But yeah, I got a lot of movies.

I found out that I can't access my college results on MyPride until my resource fee is dealt with. I'm going to fix it with my dad tomorrow, hopefully.

Hm. Oh yeah, I showed Hannah some Twilight Zone episodes and now she is a fan. Also she is even more in love with Joseph Gordon-Levitt after discovering hitRECord. Good for her.

I have more to say, but I can't remember what, so I'll end now. Going to bed soon, yay.

Edit: Oh yeah did I also mention that I talked to Juria a few days ago and when I brought up my broken promise she said that it was all in the past and she forgave me? Well that happened, and I feel so much better now. There is at least 80% less guilt in my life now. Also she's started writing short stories again, so go check out her blog in the sidebar because she's got talent.

Also I had my Ujian Lisan on Saturday and I think I did pretty okay. I went second, gave my speech which I had written up the night before (Probably the latest I've ever completed an assignment) stumbled a bit but covered all the points, and my only slip into English was when I started a few paragraphs with "So...". Also I got to talking to my classmate and I gave her a back massage and told her about my family and stuff, and after class I wanted to see if she wanted to go for McDonald's or something (I didn't have much money but I wouldn't mind being poorer if it meant I could go on a sorta-date). I asked her if she had a boyfriend, and she said yes, and I said I wasn't surprised. I wasn't surprised because she was pretty and smart and of course someone would want to make her his girlfriend, but I was also not surprised because she was pretty and smart and of course she would have a boyfriend because life kinda sucks sometimes and any girl like that is bound to be unavailable. Meh.